Showing posts with label Lecturers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lecturers. Show all posts

Thursday, November 21, 2019

56.0 Master The Style Of Identifying Toxic People With These 9 Signs.


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Sometimes this topic might give you a different impression if you read my other blog posts. But I wanted to share this with you all. I think that this will be a useful thing for most of us. Identify People! What do you think? Are you a genius on this subject? Though I'm going to share my experience and observations with you, I'm also not a genius on this subject. But I believe a few things I observed during my lifetime. I hope it would help you to think about your measurements before coming into decisions. It is the main purpose of this article.



From the very beginning of my life, I would like to observe people. When I'm participating in a function and when traveling by bus, I just thought about the qualities of people by considering a few things. I'm not talking about people I know. I'm talking about the observations I did for the people who I don't know and met before. Because of this behavior, some of my fellows thought that I was in another world, though I have been with them. Lol… What to do? It is one of my hobbies.




I did not give attention to many. I observed about one/two people at one time. So, most of the time my attention paid for very calm people, noisy people, and active people. First, I thought that what kind of reasons would make them act as so. My grandfather always used to remind us that "Empty Pots Are Shaking." It was the key advice he gave when we were children. Therefore, it was a predefined decision in my mind. So, when there was a noisy person, I knew that he/she was an empty pot. That advice helped me to Read People.




Do you believe your first impression of someone? Sometimes it won't work for all. But I believe my first impression. I have many examples and I'm sharing key incidents with you to prove that decision. However, it does not mean that I reject that person after the observation I got via the first impression. But I keep it as his/her background and make the negotiations with them accordingly.  However, I want to emphasize you to not to make decisions according to my views. But giving a try won't harmful to anybody. When you are identifying a new person, there is no inbuilt relationship with each other. So, definitely, you can give a try. 



What is your first impression? What does make you come to that decision? Do you know any other matching characters for your new person? What are the benefits/bad luck you have taken because of them? If you made a mistake(s) in your life because of them, how do you want to deal with this person? If you made a mistake because of your bad, how are you going to deal with this new person without losing him/her? Try to answer these questions by having a small chat with yourself along with that first observation. I believe you can analyze your decision accordingly to identify his/her background.




After that, I match that person with another I knew and tried to compare the qualities he/she has. Therefore, when I was looking at him/her self-there was a guy/gal I knew behind that person. All the time it is not a correct comparison. But I believe matching somebody you know, is a key fact that helps you to Identify People you don't know. However, I'm not asking you to do so. But, if you haven't tried it, it is better to give a try and analyze your decision. Then you can identify the accuracy of your decision.



However, it takes time to identify the accuracy of your decision. It takes time. But this kind of analysis avoids risks. You won't take a risky step in your life until that time, as you have a background-level of decision about him/her. You know the place that you need to keep that person. I believe it is enough in the initial stage.


 
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If I am moving to my key incidents, all people were my co-workers. Our workplace is such a challenging place that lets us do work with people we did not know before. So, it is very important to go through that quick check-up before starting your journey with them. So, it was my second job opportunity and at that time she was there when I was joining with them. 



She was in the reception area when I was meeting her. She did not give me a friendly welcome, though I also joined for a similar position. In that workplace, we were multi-tasks workers. We taught students in the lectures, supported them in the computer labs, managed their class fees, etc... We did the lecturing and management both. So, that girl also in the reception area to manage some stuff though he was a lecturer at that institute.



First Impression! Why could not she give a friendly smile even? It was my first inner question. She did not give eye contact as well. I thought that she was talking to someone else. So, within the first few minutes, I thought that "she should have something to hide". However, that thought did not keep for the entire day and she was friendly with me after the lunch hour. 



So, after a couple of weeks, all of us were good friends. That era was a nice time we had in my career. Therefore, I thought that my decision was wrong and I thought that I had a wrong impression about such a lovely friend. As she was there before us, her contributions to management tasks a lot and we involved with those tasks when she was not there.



One day, one of our seniors came and instructed me to manage the stuff she did. As she was not there, I did not have a doubt. Though we were thinking about her, she did not come for the entire week. We could not contact her. After another few days, we got to know that the management fired her from the job. Because she stole money that received from students. It was shocking news for all. Nobody believed that by comparing her appearance and behaviors. But it was the truth, and it was the time that reminded my first impression. 



Did she try to hide something? Yes. She had much to hide and play that role for a long time. I also involved money acceptance when she was not there. But luckily, I kept logs separately without mentioning in the main logbook. It was her advice and once she came, she cumulated all with fraud logs. However, that separate logbook saved me from fraud.




So, that situation matched with my first decision. But the mistake I did here was I did not keep that decision as her background and work accordingly with her. After a couple of days, I gave up that thought. Therefore, I never had a suspicious eye on her. So, it was easy for her to continue her tasks without worrying about us. That is why she was friendly with us. I have much to explain, guys. Wait! I don't want to summarize these incidents. I'll explain in a detail view.


I will help you to remove Toxic, Fake and Difficult People as Smart PeopleDon't you feel that you are reading a book about Sherlock Holmes? No. Right...? Lol...





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Tuesday, August 27, 2019

45.0 Go Through The Pain. Don’t Give Up Buddies...


When I was studying for a Master’s degree, most of the students were in the tired mode in the lectures. Some of them slept well. There was one lecturer who cared about us a lot. He understood our tiredness while some other lecturers ignored it as they also didn't have an option. 



One lecturer taught some theory concepts via the videos. One video went for about ten minutes, and at that time he used to sit in the last rows. At that time, I took a break and did not watch the video. I used to listen in by closing my eyes and covered my forehead area via a hand.


A few lecturers want our active participation in the lectures. So, one of the lecturers arranged some group activities and asked questions. One day he asked us to explain a work incident related to conflict management with the actions we took to resolve it. I did not want to put any effort into anything which did not use to evaluate us. I did not put my effort to say a word even if it did not belong to the evaluation of our program. I was tired. Lol...


Most of the weekdays were very tired for me because of office hours, lectures, and restless weekends. Therefore, I could not focus on studies at night after completing all those main tasks. Most of the time I went to the office like a zombie. I could say that I have dragged to the office and I did not go there.



One day one of my office friends came to my seat and talked about some friendly things with me. After a few minutes, he said 'Shall I ask something? As I agreed he asked 'Are you suffering from any problem? I have noticed your behavior for some time, and it was not normal. I could see some sort of fear on your face. What is the reason behind this situation? At that time, I wanted to laugh and I did not have a proper answer to give him. I thought that he won't believe if I told the truth 'Exam pressure because of the way he talked to me. However, I told about exams and assignments including my bad health.


However, I knew that he did not believe me. He suggested healthy foods and exercises as some options. Later on, I thought that there could be such an alien look on my face when thinking about that pressurize environment I lived with workload and studies. So, his observation was correct. Why do you have fear on your face??? That was a marvelous question. Lol...


Actually, health also not in good condition. Though I had separate Vitamins also there was a pain in the whole body because of an unknown reason. From time to time I have attacked by fever and cold on top of that pain. So, I could say that it was an endless pain. I could not get rid of the cold.  


Not only me, most of the students pressurized because of their busy schedules. Apart from all, most of us were suffering from various illnesses. I think tiredness was the main reason for us to be the victim of most of the diseases. Some of them left their jobs as well. I left my job after going through these main hurdles. As I said earlier still, some questions don't have proper answers. Lol...



The mid-semester consists of both exams and assignments. There was no enough gap in between some exam days and assignment deadlines. Therefore, I took study leaves for eight working days, I think. When I was staying at my uncle's home, some people saw me at that time, though I lived there for a long time period. So, one uncle saw me and he asked about my studies. 


He said that one of his relative daughters was looking after her kids by staying at home though she is MSc holder. I think he tried to say that my destiny also will be the same as his relative. Though I wanted to slap him, I listened to his story, peacefully without any response. I think if I told him something at that time, he would be an enemy now. Lol...


After studying for a few days, I felt that the desk was not in the correct location in the room and lighting was not enough for studies. Therefore, I moved my desk from time to time and it was in three to four different locations in the room. Our housemaid asked 'why did you move it to the previous location if it was not good for you earlier. I did not have an answer actually, though I wanted to say that 'Shut up... I'm going crazy...


Actually, I don't know the exact reason for that much pressure, and it was similar for most of the students. Some of them had junk foods like nothing during this time, and most of the boys used to drink energy drinks. 



One of my friends had some tablets that recommended for athletics to keep them awake. One day once I sat for the exam, I saw that one of our lecturers was sitting in the exam hall. But it was a blurred scene, and on that day, I got to know about my eye vision.


Though I had my Tea, breakfast, lunch, and snacks before the exam, I had a bottle of soft drink just a few minutes before the exam. I used to have it before going to the exam hall. I did it as a practice for entire exams. As I mentioned earlier, there were many questions without answers during this period. There were plenty of abnormal behaviors. Lol…


However, though it was a hectic and ridiculous time, I know that it always gave benefits to me. So, I could say that the tough past is like an investment in our lives where we can take harvest later.


So, go through the pain buddies… Don’t give up.